The Analytical Engine

The official blog of Erik Mona. Editor. Author. Diet Dr. Pepper Addict.

Name:Erik Mona
Location:Ballard, Washington, United States

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Speaking of the End of the World


According to a recent post at John Gorenfeld's indispensable Where in Washington, D.C. is Sun Myung Moon?, the following words recently came out of the mouth of Washington Times owner and self-proclaimed messiah Sun Myung Moon:

"There remains the final 8-year course from now until the year 2012 and the kingship of the physical and spiritual world."

Faced with such doggerel, Gorenfeld understandably asks:

"What happens in 2012?"

Cue the theramin.

2012 is going to be out of this world because it's the end of the Mayan "Long Count" calendar, often cited as the date of End of the World by consipiracy types (see google) and as the beginning of a new era of mankind by touchie feely new agers (Ibid.).

So, you know, here's hoping that's not what the True Father is thinking...

Monday, March 28, 2005

Open Letter to the Constitutional Convention

Is this what you had in mind?

Friday, March 25, 2005

Ch-ch-changes


So I'm telling Kyle a long story about one of my ancient Greyhawk websites, and remembered one of the creepiest, most fascinating sites I ever discovered while trundling through the Internet looking for funny text links. Unfortunately, when I tried to Google the site to show Kyle the most unbelievably obsessive-compulsive site in the world, I discovered that it had long since bit the dust. The link from my old site went to a dead end, and it seemed like my story had died on a sour note.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Wayback Machine.

And, courtesy of my new favorite invention, I can now bring you, and Kyle, "Transformation Stories List: Lycanthropy, Shapechanging Magic, Nanotechnology, Shapeshifters..."

Spend some time with it.

Soak it in.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Age of Worms Character Background 1: Tyralandi Scrimm

Prior to the first playtest session of the Age of Worms Adventure Path campaign, I wrote about a page of text for each player in the campaign. I thought it would be fun to share these backgrounders as we get closer to publication of the first installment, "The Whispering Cairn," by yours truly.

So here we go. We'll do one a week until I've covered everyone.

Tyralandi Scrimm (James Jacobs)

About a week ago, while lounging alone in your favorite mausoleum, you noticed a presence in Diamond Lake’s cemetery. With a bit of nervous hesitation, you approached the small figure, not knowing what to expect. The light of Oerth’s twin moons illuminated a bizarre character with blood red skin and white hair. Unusual whirls and sigils, perhaps birthmarks, perhaps tattoos, traced the healfling’s arms and hands—and maybe more of him as well. You knew him immediately as the Demon Boy, one of the star attractions in the Emporium, Diamond Lake’s justly famous whorehouse/freakshow.

The two of you found that you had much in common, having both lived the carny life. The Demon Boy, whom you later learned was named Aroval, seemed to yearn for the travel of your earlier days, and together the two of you hatched a plan to raise enough money to abandon Diamond Lake forever.

Rumors around Diamond Lake speak of a trio of adventurers from the nearby City of Greyhawk, metropolis of wizards and thieves. They’ve been spending a lot of time in the village’s watering holes, proclaiming to all their intention to explore an ancient tomb on the lake’s northeast shore called the Stirgenest Cairn. You know that their plan will fail, since you’ve been to the Stirgenest Cairn and found it raped of its treasures centuries ago, just like all of the other empty tombs in the Cairn Hills.

But it got you thinking. What if the hills outside Diamond Lake hold other unexplored cairns, still laden with treasure? On one of your few trips to the village about a year ago, you met a young man named Dram Cicaeda, the son of the chief cartographer in Diamond Lake’s imposing garrison. You contacted him a few days ago with your idea, and asked him to look through the garrison’s old maps for reference to any cairns that aren’t well known (and hence well explored) by the local populace. He hit paydirt almost immediately, and claims to have a map that reveals just such a location near a mine that went dry several decades ago. He doesn’t even think any of the powerful mine managers in town lay claim to the spot, so it’s been mostly forgotten.

You asked him to help you assemble of group of friends and acquaintances who might be interested in joining you and Aroval on the mission. The group is due to meet at an abandoned mining building not far from Dram’s mysterious cairn this morning, to discuss the operation and to set off immediately for the cairn and a new life filled with adventure and excitement.

--Erik Mona

Friday, March 04, 2005

Another Ancient Culture of Oerth

This one's from a fairly obscure source, "Ex Keraptis Cum Amore," an adventure by Andy Miller published in Dungeon #77 (November/December 1999).

"Long a scholar of an ancient race called the Torhoon (whose empire, based on alchemy and magic, was centered in Hepmonaland over 8,000 years ago), the mad lich crafted his dungeon on their writings and style. He strove to make the dungeon seem authentically ancient, going so far as to use the ancient Torhoon language in his riddles and fill the place with Torhoon artifacts of his own. In his insanity, he soon came to believe that the dungeon was an ancient Torhoon site, and that he was the sole preserver of the Torhoon legacy."

There might be a few more details in the adventure (they have "serpentine writing," for example), but I'll have to give it a more thorough study later. I've added the Torhoon (and a few other ancient kingdoms) to the table a few posts below.